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1. Jeans Over Trousers, 99% of the time. You’ve got to be a real stickler for fit, wash and rise when it comes to denim. I like my jeans sprayed-on and washed black or mid-stonewash blue. A turn-up is practically mandatory and must be no more and no less than two precise turns of the hem. Previously, busted knees were only accepted if they were of organic origin; I would never buy pre-distressed jeans until the only jeans that were sold in shops were pre-distressed. Jeggings are not acceptable: jeans must have belt loops and five pockets. A cigarette pant is your only trouser option for formal events, which must be tailored for optimum fit and ankle-baring.

2. Find Your Neutral, and buy all your basics in shade variations of that colour. Grey suits my pale olive complexion, and makes me look more golden than yellow. Building your wardrobe around black, white, navy or grey means that you have endless permutations of garments which compliment you, and you can afford to spend more on footwear and outerwear.

3. Outerwear Is Everything. A black leather biker jacket collar popped like antennae and a relaxed-fit blue denim jacket are my essentials for day-to-day wear. But I fiend for outerwear: I have one double wardrobe for jackets and coats, and one double wardrobe for everything else. My current favourite is this ASOS Desert Camo Jacket £45 which I have worn with jeans and vans during the day, and with a dress and heels on a date. I would venture that your choice of outerwear is more influential upon the overall complexion of an outfit than your shoes. Yeah, I said that.

4. LOYALTY. When Violet got her White Converse All Stars, she asked the sales assistant if she could wear them out of the shop, and told him she’d wear them forever. The guy was like, “You probably will, y’know”. I’m not averse to trying new things and I’ve certainly dabbled (actually crying at the fact that these were my favourite trainers for months in 2007 – I thought I was Maya Arulpragasam), but promiscuity doesn’t work for me: I’ve been wearing Vans everyday for half my life.

5. Looking cool over looking hot, every single time, no matter where I’m going, what I’m doing, who I’m going to see. Looking hot is boring and easy and predictable. The coolest thing about looking cool is that looking cool is hot.

Born to be wild,




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